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WISDOW OF DIME BAG DARREL
1) Have a positive outlook. A lot of bands whine about the road and
how tough it is. Fuck all that. With the right outlook, you can learn to entertain yourself and entertain each other so you
can enjoy doing what your doing. There's obviously gonna be highs and lows, and the trick to it is to be able to maintain
composure and stay high even when you're in the lows. That way when you hit the highs it'll be twice as killer.
2)
You've got to have booze! Booze is the healer and booze is the feeler. Whenever you're getting into rock and roll mode, nothing
kicks it in better than a couple of shots of whisky and a cold beer. It kinda takes some of the distractions away and helps
bring things into focus. You know the difference between listening to a record sober and listening to it after having a couple,
it's immaculate ... it's goddamned electric. So you've definitely got to have booze to survive. And, before I forget, the
occasional, green "behavioral modification device" is also a necessity every now and again!
3) On the same
note: when you wake up and you've got a gig to play but you're still half drunk and hurtin' big-time, you're gonna be dehydrated.
The best thing to re-hydrate yourself isn't Gatorade, it's Pedialyte, the stuff they give to kids when they're shitting in
their britches! So, get yourself some water and then go for the cheap Mexican food. That's a survival trick that'll get you
back on the right track.
4) When you're on the road, you've got to have your four-track .. or some kind of
recording device to jam on and have a good time. That way, you can work on new riffs, or write a cheap song about some jacked-off
experience that just happened to you .. something everybody can catch a nut on the next day.
5) Always have
a collection of your favourite CDs with you. Music drives you. It wakes you up, it gets you pumping. And, at the end of the
day, the correct tune will chill you down.
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